"Morality in Albanian Society from Illyria to the Present Day" from the book being prepared for publication
By Pilo Zyba
If Stefan Zweig analyzes the inner drama of the individual, Erich Fromm goes a step further: he sees moral crisis as a crisis of relationships. For Fromm, morality is not measured solely by norms or individual conscience, but by a person’s capacity to love.
In his work “The Art of Loving,” Fromm emphasizes that love is not a spontaneous feeling or a biological instinct, but a moral act, a spiritual discipline, and a responsibility. Love requires maturity, awareness, and respect for the other as an end in themselves—an idea directly linked to Kantian ethics.
In this light, the moral crisis of Albanian society today is clearly evident in the family and in intimate relationships. The traditional Albanian family was built on authority, sacrifice, and moral obligation. Love was often implied, not expressed; roles were defined, not negotiated.
Democracy and modernity freed the individual from these structures, but, as Fromm would say, freedom without the capacity to love turns into isolation. The contemporary Albanian often experiences:
-Fear of emotional intimacy,
-Insecurity in relationships,
-A crisis of trust between partners, and a disconnect between sexuality and moral feeling.
SEXUALITY, MORALITY, AND THE MISUNDERSTANDING OF FREEDOM
Fromm warns clearly: a society that reduces sexuality to consumption and pleasure, disconnected from responsibility and love, produces spiritual alienation. This is also observed in contemporary Albanian society, where the rapid transition from extreme taboos to unchecked liberalism has created moral confusion.
Sexuality was freed from prohibition, but not from anxiety. The family lost its traditional moral authority, but it was not replaced by emotional and ethical education. As a result:
-Relationships become fragile,
-Connections are often temporary, and love is confused with possession or the fear of loneliness.
Fromm would call this state a crisis in the art of loving: people want to be loved, but they do not know how to love.
The contemporary Albanian: between Kant, Nietzsche, Zweig, and Fromm.
At this point, the figure of the Albanian today can be understood as a tension between four moral horizons:
Kant demands responsibility and moral dignity,
Nietzsche demands the courage to create values,
Zweig reveals the wounds and fears of the soul to us,
Fromm teaches us that without mature love, any morality remains empty.
Morality in the family, love, and sexuality can no longer be built on fear, shame, or blind authority, nor on relativism and momentary pleasure. It requires emotional awareness, dialogue, and mutual responsibility.
Contemporary Albanian morality stands at a crossroads: between a strong traditional heritage and the challenges of the modern world. It cannot be saved either by turning back or by blindly imitating foreign models.
Moral reconstruction requires:
-Moral autonomy (Kant),
-Courage for new values (Nietzsche),
-Acknowledgment of the soul and its wounds (Zweig), and above all, the capacity to love responsibly (Fromm).
Only when love, the family, and sexuality are treated as moral dimensions of the human being can society regain its ethical balance. Morality is no longer a command; it is the art of living with the other.
CONCRETE ALBANIA: EVERYDAY MORALITY IN THE FAMILY, LOVE, AND INTIMACY
In today’s Albania, the moral crisis no longer manifests in grand ideological forms, but in everyday life: in the family, in love relationships, in the way sexuality and responsibility toward the other are experienced. Morality no longer clashes with the law or religion, but with psychological exhaustion, economic insecurity, and emotional fragmentation.
The Albanian family is caught between two models that do not easily merge. On the one hand, the traditional heritage demands:
-Patience,
-Sacrifice,
-Preserving unity “at all costs.”
On the other hand, the modern model demands:
-Self-realization,
-Emotional freedom,
-Equality and communication.
In practice, many Albanian families live in a silent moral conflict: they stay together without dialogue, sacrifice without love, or separate without reflection. Here, as Erich Fromm would say, the problem is not a lack of love, but a lack of the capacity to love maturely.
Albanian love: between fear and dependence
In love relationships, the contemporary Albanian often swings between two extremes:
-The fear of abandonment, and the fear of commitment.
This produces unstable relationships, where jealousy, control, and insecurity replace trust. In this context, the morality of love is not violated by grand betrayals, but by a lack of emotional presence, by an inability to listen and to respect the autonomy of the other.
Here Kant and Fromm align: the other is not always treated as an end in themselves, but as a means to fill a personal emotional void. Love turns into a need, not a moral act.
Albanian sexuality: freedom without ethical education
Sexuality in Albania has gone from extreme prohibition to partial freedom, but without sufficient emotional and ethical education. Even today:
-It is rarely spoken about openly in the family,
-Healthy sex education is lacking, and sexuality remains divorced from moral dialogue.
This creates a paradoxical situation: freedom exists in practice, but shame and guilt exist in the conscience. As Stefan Zweig would note, this divide produces spiritual tension, anxiety, and moral self-censorship.
Sexuality is not a moral problem in itself; it becomes a problem when it is disconnected from responsibility, sensitivity, and respect for the other.
A possible new morality for Albania
If we take this analysis seriously, then Albanian morality today cannot be rebuilt with slogans or nostalgia. It requires concrete steps:
-The return of dialogue in the family,
-Emotional and ethical education from childhood,
-The normalization of conversation about love and sexuality, and the building of relationships on respect, not fear.
This is the moment where philosophy becomes practice: morality is no longer simply “how we ought to be,” but how we live with one another every day.
WHY ALBANIAN YOUTH TODAY NO LONGER FIGHT FOR THE FAMILY
In contemporary Albanian society, a visible shift can be observed in young people’s relationship with the family. What was once seen as a life project is today often perceived as a burden, a limitation, or a risk to personal freedom. The question should not be framed with judgment, but with reflection: why do Albanian youth today no longer see the family as a moral ideal, but as a difficult compromise?
First, this does not stem from a lack of values, but from a lack of trust. Young people have grown up seeing:
-Emotionally exhausted families,
-Marriages held together only by sacrifice, not by love,
-Silent conflict between parents, and often a parenthood without dialogue.
In this sense, the family did not appear as a space of emotional safety, but as a survival structure. As Erich Fromm would say, a person does not reject love; they reject the forms of love that produce fear and dependence.
Casual sexuality: freedom or psychological defense?
The turn of a portion of the youth toward casual sexual relationships should not be read simply as moral depravity. Often, it is a defense mechanism. A temporary relationship requires less emotional responsibility, less risk of disappointment, and less inner exposure.
Here Stefan Zweig’s analyses align perfectly: modern man often avoids deep connections not because he does not feel, but because he fears the intensity of feeling. Sexuality detached from love becomes a way to be close to the other without surrendering completely.
In this sense, we are not dealing with a predominance of bodily desire, but with a fear of spiritual intimacy.
From moral obligation to the lack of a moral project
In traditional Albanian society, the family was often created out of moral obligation and social pressure. Today, this obligation has vanished, but it has not been replaced by a conscious moral project for the family.
Kant would say that freedom without responsibility is not moral autonomy, but arbitrariness. Young people are freer than ever to choose, but they often lack an ethical orientation for what to choose. The family requires patience, communication, self-control—virtues that are not sufficiently cultivated in a fragmented and economically insecure society.
Albania: insecurity as a moral factor
The concrete Albanian factor cannot be ignored:
-Economic insecurity,
-Mass emigration,
-The lack of social stability.
Young people do not avoid the family because they do not want responsibility, but because they do not see the conditions to maintain it with dignity. Here morality clashes with material reality. Without hope for the future, love becomes temporary and the family a risk.
What is missing today: education for love
Ultimately, the problem is neither sexuality nor the family, but the lack of education for healthy relationships. No one teaches young people how to:
-Communicate emotionally,
-Manage conflict,
-Build trust, and preserve individuality within the relationship.
As Fromm would say, Albanian society has taught people how to survive, but not how to love.
Albanian youth have not lost their morality; they have lost a convincing model of love and family. Casual sexuality is not a rejection of values, but the sign of a generation seeking connection without pain, without disappointment, and without failure.
The moral challenge for Albania today is not to judge its youth, but to create conditions where the family is not a blind sacrifice, but a conscious choice, built on mature love, emotional security, and mutual respect.
